MOM: I heard you passed your urine test to work at the local ABC store.
SON: What can I say? Jesus himself could not have had more impeccable urine than yours truly.
MOM: I'm proud of you, Joey.
SON: Ohh, stop it, Mom!
MOM: Now have a good time at the Dare rally.
SON: I just hope I don't run into Derek.
MOM: Why don't you want to see Derek? I thought he was your best drug-free friend.
SON: He is, but he and I had a falling out about American drug policy.
MOM: Really? What happened?
SON: Well, he agrees with Los Angeles Police Chief Daryl Gates that drug users should be taken out and shot.
MOM: Sounds like a reasonable point of view to me.
SON: Whereas I think William Bennett had the right idea when he said that drug users should be beheaded instead.
MOM: Well, now I think that's a topic upon which reasonable people can disagree.
SON: I'm off.
MOM: Oh, and we're all out of coffee. And Tylenol now that I think of it.
SON: Mom.
MOM: Oh, and if the pharmacy is still open, your sister needs her pills for depression, anxiety and ADHD.
SON: I tell you what, Mom, why don't I just bring back the entire store?
MOM: Don't be such a dope.
SON: Dope, dope?
MOM: I know, I know. You don't do dope.
Comedy
The drug war is laughable -- or it would be if the drug warriors hadn't deprived us of laughing gas, the substance that William James himself used to study alternate realities. (Gee, thanks, folks, for censoring academia. Don't worry, though, I'm not going to call you prohibitionists 'fascist bastards' on THAT account. Mom just didn't raise me like that.)_
Drug Warriors should be legally banned from watching or reading Sherlock Holmes stories, since in their world, it is a crime for such people as Sherlock Holmes to exist, i.e., people who use medicines to improve their mind and mood.
Don't the Oregon prohibitionists realize that all the thousands of deaths from opiates is so much blood on their hands?
This is why "rock stars" use drugs: not just for performance anxiety (which, BTW, is a completely UNDERSTANDABLE reason for drug use), but because they want to fully experience the music, even tho' they may be currently short on money and being hassled by creditors, etc.
In the board game "Sky Team," you collect "coffees" to improve your flying skills. Funny how the use of any other brain-focusing "drug" in real life is considered to be an obvious sign of impairment.
"Abuse" is a funny term because it implies that there's a right way to use "drugs," which is something that the drug warriors deny. To the contrary, they make the anti-scientific claim that "drugs" are not good for anybody for any reason at any dose.
Outlawing opium wOutlawing opium was the ultimate government power grab. It put the government in charge of pain relief.
as the ultimate government power grab. It put the government in charge of pain relief.
Americans are far more fearful of psychoactive drugs than is warranted by either anecdote or history. We require 100% safety before we will re-legalize any "drug" -- which is a safety standard that we do not enforce for any other risky activity on earth.
The existence of a handful of bad outcomes of drug use does not justify substance prohibition... any more than the existence of drunkards justifies a call for liquor prohibition. Instead, we need to teach safe use and offer a wide choice of uncontaminated psychoactive drugs.
Even if the FDA approved MDMA today, it would only be available for folks specifically pronounced to have PTSD by materialist doctors, as if all other emotional issues are different problems and have to be studied separately. That's just ideological foot-dragging.
Pundits have been sniffing about the "smell" of Detroit lately. Sounds racist -- especially since such comments tend to come from drug warriors, the guys who ruined Detroit in the first place (you know, with drug laws that incentivized profit-seeking violence as a means of escaping poverty).
Buy the Drug War Comic Book by the Drug War Philosopher Brian Quass, featuring 150 hilarious op-ed pics about America's disgraceful war on Americans
You have been reading an article entitled, A Dope Comedy Routine About Drugs published on November 5, 2023 on AbolishTheDEA.com. For more information about America's disgraceful drug war, which is anti-patient, anti-minority, anti-scientific, anti-mother nature, imperialistic, the establishment of the Christian Science religion, a violation of the natural law upon which America was founded, and a childish and counterproductive way of looking at the world, one which causes all of the problems that it purports to solve, and then some, visit the drug war philosopher, at abolishTheDEA.com. (philosopher's bio; go to top of this page)
You have been reading an article entitled, A Dope Comedy Routine About Drugs published on November 5, 2023 on AbolishTheDEA.com. For more information about America's disgraceful drug war, which is anti-patient, anti-minority, anti-scientific, anti-mother nature, imperialistic, the establishment of the Christian Science religion, a violation of the natural law upon which America was founded, and a childish and counterproductive way of looking at the world, one which causes all of the problems that it purports to solve, and then some, visit the drug war philosopher, at abolishTheDEA.com. (philosopher's bio; go to top of this page)
